And so we begin again – it’s another thrilling season of The Amazing Race. Another season of eyebrow pops, parents learning to respect their kids, couples using the Race as a ‘test’ of their relationship, teams that don’t understand the concept of ‘Race!’, and of course – another season of hilarity from roadblocks involving animals. Giddy up!
But first – let’s introduce the teams, shall we?
Maria & Tiffany – professional poker players who decide to tell everyone they work with the homeless hoping to get the ‘awwww’ vote from the other teams. They are also think they can ‘flirt’ to get what they want. Um.. sorry ladies, but you’re not that pretty.
Team Name: For now I’ll call them Team Poker Face. (Note: I think a lot of the team names will change as we learn more about them in the next few eps.)
Words/Phrases I bet they’ll use over and over: ‘don’t underestimated us’, ‘hurry up!’, ‘he’s cuuute! (insert giggle)’
Likability: Annoying.
Brian & Ericka – TAR producers killed two birds with one stone by combining the ‘new married couple’ with the requisite ‘Beauty Queen’. Actually, Ericka once held the Miss America title. Impressive. And Brian.. well, he’s kinda Joe Schmoe.
Team Name: Don’t really have a name for them yet. Maybe ‘Team Bland’. Despite their interesting ‘Beauty and the Schmo’ relationship, they are quite boring.
Words/Phrases I bet they’ll use over and over: ??? They really are Team Bland because I can only think of really generic phrases for them.
Likability: Meh.
Lance & Keri – the ‘meathead’ title belongs to Lance (and kudos to Tiffany from Team Poker Face for coming up with that one). He’s loud, arrogant, obnoxious and completely unapologetic. And maybe she’s worse because she loves him.
Team Name: For now, I guess they are team Meathead. Or Keri & the Neck. Because seriously? He’s got a thick Neck! Thick with a big vein that you KNOW pulses when he gets angry. Really, he’s just the ‘hulk’ with his attitude dial stuck on ‘prick’.
Words/Phrases: I foresee lots of rude shouting and screaming. Also, ‘very competitive’, ‘cutthroat’, and of course, the ‘We’re not here to make friends’ excuse as to why they act like dicks.
Likability: Gross.
Zev & Justin – buddies who kinda look like brothers. Zev has aspbergers which seems to make him very calm, a little socially awkward, but very focused.
Team Name: Team JZ (get it? Like Jay-Z! hee)
Words/Phrases: lots of deadpan remarks that are actually quite funny. And lots of ‘take your time’, ‘you can do it’ support phrases.
Likability: I like this team. They seem to be here to race, not to gossip, find love, backstab, act obnoxious, etc.
Mika & Canaan – New couple and Christians. He’s already talked about God and she’s telling the world that since they aren’t having sex, she knows he must like her for more than just her body. So while they’re not like the Weaver Family (condemning people, acting holier than thou and thinking that God will favour them to win), they do seem a little.. dysfunctional. How come TAR never casts normal Christians? Actually, I bet they do. But those racers don’t go around cramming that down other people’s throats or mentioning it every other episode. The ones that do tend to be the dysfunctional ones. Case in point, Mika & Canaan.
Team Name: This year’s Team Christians
Words/Phrases: ‘respect’ and ‘deep’ (as in, he’s so ‘deep’ because he plays the guitar)
Likability: Not so much
Flight Time & Big Easy – Real, honest to goodness Harlem Globetrotters! Tall, cool and pretty darn funny.
Team Name: Duh! Team Globetrotters.
Words/Phrases: Laughter.
Likability: Seriously? Who doesn’t like Harlem Globetrotters?
Sam & Dan – requisite ‘gay’ team and brothers. I totally liked this team right from the beginning and just grew to love them more and more as the episode progressed.
Team Name: Team My favourite
Words/Phrases: ‘whatever’
Likability: 10!
Gary & Matt – father and son, hoping to reconnect and yada, yada, yada.. you know the drill.
Team Name: TBD
Words/Phrases: ‘i’m not a kid anymore’, ‘make up for lost time’, ‘bonding’, ‘i love you son/dad (insert sniff)’
Likability: ok
Eric & Lisa – yoga teachers who think they are really, really cool, because they ALSO have tattoos and are ‘hard core’. They are totally the type of team that would call themselves, ‘hardcore’ and ‘edgy’. Which means, they totally aren’t. Just like the teams that tell people they are ‘the funny team’. If you have to tell us, you aren’t that funny.
Team Name: “Hardcore”. Note the quotes. This only works WITH quotes. WITHOUT quotes, Hardcore = Colin from TAR 5. Colin was totally the real deal and though he was a bit of a prick, he is still (IMHO) the Best Damn Racer EVER. He really was, hardcore.)
Words/Phrases: See above.
Likability: Not so much.
Garrett & Jessica – the on again and off again couple. Time to use the race to see if the relationship is worth saving, you know?
Team Name: Undecided? (as in, they are ‘undecided’ in the relationship)
Words/Phrases: ‘should we?’, ‘shouldn’t we?’. Honestly, who cares? Just race!
Likability: Meh
Marcy & Ron – requisite old team. He seems normal and she’s utterly annoying. Was she a kindergarten teacher before? She talks to everyone like they’re 5, she’s waay too peppy and she’s a total cruise director. She’s totally the type of person to say ‘turn your frown upside down’. You know, the type of person you want to hit in the morning before your coffee. And their strategy, as with ALL old teams on this show, is ‘we may be slower, but we’re smarter.’ We’ll see.
Team Name: This year’s Team Old.
Phrases: ‘underdogs’, ‘whippersnappers’, ‘where’s the ben-gay?’
Likability: Ron? Ok. Marcy? Not so much.
Meghan & Cheyne – blondes who are childhood sweethearts. And honestly, I totally didn’t remember them. I actually had to look up the teams to figure out who they are. And then I remembered that partway through the race, I had them confused with the Christians. So when they showed up later in the same scene as the Christians, I’m like.. WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Team Name: This year’s Team Who?
Phrases: Did they talk? I can’t remember.
Likability: Who?
AND NOW…
The World is waiting for you.
Good Luk.
Travel Safe.
Go!
EPISODE 1
First Task:
A bit of twist! A team will be eliminated IMMEDIATELY at the starting point! How sucky would that be? You make it on the Race ONLY to be eliminated before even leaving the country! Anyway, all 12 teams are given a clue asking them to find the 11 correct
And I’m happy to say that the first team eliminated, after being on the Race for a total of FIVE minutes, is... Team “Hardcore”. YAY! However, the second last team was Keri & the Neck. As much as I didn’t like “Hardcore”, I would have preferred them to Keri & the Neck. Oh well. At least I have my ‘Big Bad’ for this season with the Neck.
All teams are now on their way to
All teams are bunched once they get to the first task in
The host spins the wheel (think ‘wheel of fortune’ or giant sushi roulette wheel) and if you got ‘wasabi roll’, your teammate had 2 minutes to eat the wasabi filled handroll (there was so much wasabi, it looked like an ice cream cone!). The rest of the teams would have to eat sushi. It kinda sucked because you had to wait until the ‘wasabi roll’ hit your team, and all ‘games of chance’ kinda suck. Most people had no problems – and I know this because they showed each and every team eat that wasabi bomb. It was funny at first, but then it got a little boring. Only Maria from Team Poker face and Joe Schmo from have problems and therefore created some much needed drama. They finish their rolls, but still have some food in their mouth when the timer runs out. So they have to do it AGAIN! I can’t even imagine the horror.
Once the teams finish their rolls, they have to lead 20 audience members (little, Japanese housewives), across town and to the pit stop. Most get a little lost, but end up finding their way. As you can imagine, the Globetrotters were waay taller than everyone on the street, which was kinda funny. And they even carried one of their housewives when they got tired. Love!
Philimination:
First team on the mat is Team Who (yes, even though they came in FIRST, I don’t remember them). Finally, Team Poker Face end up at the pit stop, red faced and devastated. Not only are they last, but they LOST two housewives. Phil is... happy to tell them it s a non-elim. However, they have to suffer a 2 hour penalty for not completing the task (that’s IT?) and must complete a speed bump. Personally, I would have made them go back out and look for the housewives. No rest for you until you come back with ALL your housewives. Sadly, that didn’t happen.
EPISODE 2 (or EPISODE 1: PART 2)
Teams leave
The next morning, all teams take boats to their next task – filling a designated area around a tree with really heavy, gooey, clay-like, mud. This seems to take forever, is physically tiring, but not difficult. Pokerface must complete the easiest speedbump EVER before taking the boat. They take all the ingredients for pho from one store to a guy on the dock and must make him a bowl. Seriously? THAT’S ALL? They didn’t even need to go any where, the store was at the docks!
Duck wrangling time!! Teams leave the docks and ride to a duck farm where one team member must wrangle a bunch of ducks (50?100?) around a set course by waving two flags. If they cannot complete the task within the time limit, they must start again, when a course becomes available. Hilarity ensues. While some teams remain calm, most were crying fowl (har har!). Finally, we ended up with a bunch of girls running around, desperately flagging the ducks. While the duck wrangling was entertaining, I found more enjoyment watching the boy’s reaction as they watched their teammates fail again and again. Schmo yelled directions, Team Who remained encouraging, Undecided? blamed each other and the Christians just Lost it! He was screaming and freaking out, instead of thinking, ‘what would Jesus’ do?
Philimination:
It came down to Beauty & Schmo and Undecided?, and it was close! Both left roughly at the same time and Beauty & Schmo just squeaked by. Undecided?, we never really knew ye. And we really didn’t care to.
Noteworthy:
-Team Pokerface told everyone they worked with the homeless but were busted when someone at the airport recognized them. Apparently, they are quite famous and Tiffany is ranked in the top 20. I’m guessing they’re both pretty cha-ching. The other teams were not impressed.
-Team Pokerface think My Favourites are ‘cute’ and repeatedly say so during their interviews. Which is just brilliant because 1) My Favourites are gay and 2) Pokerface keeps talking about how they are super perceptive and can ‘read’ people, since they are successful poker players. Ha ha ha.
-My Favourites totally know that Pokerface is crushing on them. So they decided NOT to tell them they’re gay, hoping to milk this situation. Love it!!
-Team Old were SO annoying while leading the housewives around – making them skip, yell silly chants and treated them like children.
-The Christian Boy actually said ‘With Mika, I’m pure’. Who talks like that?? Creepy! Or do I mean, Creep!
-Team Bland (Beauty & Schmo) did pretty well at the airport – when they ran out of plane tickets to
-Zev was so good at corralling the ducks, Justin nicknamed him the ‘duck whisperer’. Zev was quite cute and smiled so proudly at his new nickname. if J and I were on the Race, for sure I'd be the duck wrangler. But I think J would have eaten the Wasabi Bomb (sorry man!).
And that ends the season premiere of TAR 15 and this extra LONG recap. Can't wait for next week!
No comments:
Post a Comment